What's In A Word?

Have you ever looked at a word and just made yourself all confused?

I was reading the word "flower" and for some reason my mind just couldn't process it. I thought FLOW-er? FLO-er? Of course if I had read the word even a little bit in context it would have made total sense without me resorting to moving my lips while I read.

And yes, the irony that my most recent post was in fact about a flower was not lost on me.

E

Bah Humbug!

It's getting to be that time of year when I'm completely overwhelmed. The irony is that I'm actually at the end of all of our holiday commitments. This is really the time of year I swear, "never again!" Of course, that sentiment doesn't stick.

I will say have have scaled back this year in all things and that despite the busyness of the season I haven't been totally stressed out. I've tried really hard to keep perspective and pray for guideance on what is really important.

Sorry I haven't been around much, but I'm sure you are all just as crazy this time of year. Here is hoping your world slows down a bit also and we can catch up soon!

-e

You Say It's Your Birthday? It's My Birthday Too! Nah Nah Nah Nah!

I think I'll just get it out in the open that today is my birthday. I'm okay with it. Maybe I'm trying to convince me more than you?

Since it's a school holiday I'm home with my beloved children. Yep, they've promised to behave and be nice to each other all day in honor of my birthday. Too bad that proclamation went out the door at 9:00 a.m. when they came to fisticuffs over an action figure.

*sigh*

I'm off to Best Buy to exchange the car charger that the shithead clerk in the the cell phone accessory area said would work with Papa's Samsung phone. It does not. Oh, correction he did not actually say it would work, that would have been too much trouble. Rather he wordlessly handed me the package and walked away. Don't you love the customer service?

-e

Just Wondering

How many times do you invite someone to a recurring event that is a schedule conflict for that person before it is considered annoying? And then when you stop inviting them, but others are talking about it, is that rude? It's one of those fine line things. You want to invite the person because you don't want them to feel like you don't want them there, but they never come so why keep extending yourself? You feel me? I mean if that person came every once in awhile I could see maintaining the invitation, but if they consistently decline isnt' it time to move on?

-e

Help, I’ve Started Something And I Can’t Finish It!

I can not seem to find a way to finish a project. This morning I got up (and yes, I’m still home with a chicken pox kid) and am cleaning out two cabinets. Just two. Still, every item out of the cabinet begets a new task. I’m trying really hard to stay focused, but here I sit in from of my computer working on my blog. I’m doing a great job, aren’t I?

It’s not just today, it’s every thing. I’m trying to decide if I’m going to homeschool next year. Every time I get some information I find another side of the story. I’m sorry it’s the reporter in me. I have been trained to investigate both sides and report objectively and accurately. Yes, I know this is not a story, but rather my son’s education and I’m not good at making decisions.

*sigh*

Oh, yeah. We did talk to the peditrician about The Negotiator’s inability to focus. We chatted about it while we were there for his chicken pox — did I tell y’all he DOES have chicken pox?? — and we’re exploring our options. She gave me a book to read, um, do they have an audio book on this so I can listen while I’m in the car? I’ve brought up the subject of homeschooling to The Negotiator. So far, well, let’s just say he’s skeptical. I haven’t broached the subject vis-a-vis me homeschooling him, but rather introduced the idea generally. We talked about what homeschooling is, who he knows that is homeschooled and some of the reasons people have school at home. So far he’s very noncommittal. I’ll let y’all know.

My dining room table looks like a hurricane waiting to die. It’s the first flat surface as you come into my home so everything gets deposited there to die. Backpacks, mail, shopping bags, school work, and the list goes on. That was my big project yesterday, to clean off the table. It’s not done and here I am starting this cabinet thing. Which leads me to the garage and the gallon on vinegar I bought to start using more natural cleaners. Which I have to come look up on the Internet. Which brings me here to my computer. Which leads me to my blog.

It’s the whole If You Give A Mouse A Cookie thing gone horribly, horribly wrong.

-e

Scanner

A friend of mine recently watched this show on PBS by Barbara Sher. My friend found that she’s a “scanner” . Which basically explains why she is having a hard time deciding what to be when she grows up. I told her she sounds like me.

I’ve been committed to my little part time job for as long as I have only because they are SO flexible and put up with me. Sometimes I think about starting a business, but as soon as it feels like work my mind is running in the other direction. I get bored in the details. I love scrapbooking. I always balked at the idea of teaching it because then it would take the love out of it for me. Despite all my protests I did eventually teach a class at Michael’s. I hated it. All the rules and regulations just made drudgery of my passion. I guess we can’t all be Oprah.

I think we might have been sold a load of crap with this whole do-what-you-love-and-the-money-will-come notion. That’s like winning the lotto, a long shot. Most of us have to pay a mortgage, bills and eat so we do things we might not be all that amped about so by the time we can give to our passion we’re wiped out. Emotionally, financially and creatively. Maybe the trick is to be happy what we’re doing and not necessarily doing what we’re happy about? I dunno.

This much I know, I love being home when my kids are home. It’s more important to me than driving a new car, than having the latest techno gadget, than having my identity through my career rather than through my family. When my boys come running to me after the school bell rings, it makes up for every sacrifice we’ve made over the years. That is our choice. That is MY choice. Others may choose differently and I respect that choice as I hope they will respect mine. I’m okay being a mom and a fill-in mom (aka preschool aged teacher). I will do it as long as I am able and I continue to be happy.

-e

My Pathetic Attempt At Self Entertainment

I haven’t been keeping up with my blog so my groups are the unfortunate recipients of my anecdotes.

I’m home by myself working on, or rather procrastinating about, getting out Cub Scout den meetings in order. Today was my day to knock it out. I have to inform our parents about the annual plan. Or at least refry the old crap. So what have I done about this task? Very little.

Oh, not that I’ve been sitting around eating bon bons and sipping mint juleps, mind you. I’ve mopped the floors, I’ve walked, taken a shower and put out the garbage. And while these are all very useful tasks, they get me no closer to my ONE goal for the day. As I’m clearing off the dining room table to make room for the books and binders that will allow me to complete this project I come across Papa’s birthday balloon. Weee! I read in my frugal-something-or-other that Mylar is great for wrapping small presents so I decided to take it apart and put it in the gift wrap container. I grab some scissors and cut off the end of the balloon with the string and wait…not all the helium is gone.

I take a hit.

“Did my voice change?” I ask myself in a Minnie Mouse tone.

Another hit.

“La la la la la la” I sing in the same squeaky voice.

Again.

“Near. Far. Where ever you are, I believe that the heart does go on…..”

Yes, I’m singing the theme song from Titanic hopped up on helium. It’s the middle of the day and I have a thousand and one things to do, but I’m amusing myself with this remake for an audience of three dogs.

-E

Thoughts From The Front Door

Have you ever walked up to the front door and try to open it by pressing the unlock on your car access? I think this is a great idea for a home improvement gadget. How many times have I walked up to the front door with an armload of sumthin or other and stood there helplessly? The boys just dance on the front porch not offering a bit of help at all.

I was in a hurry to get somewhere today and scooted out the door full of purpose. I turned around after locking the door and met head on with a bill poster (those rodents who leave ads on your doorknob). I screamed. Not just a little "eeek" mind you. A full-on-neighbors-looking-out-their-front-window sceam. She seemed to be just as startled and told me no one has ever screamed before. Good. Teach you to leave that crap on my door.

-E